TS #9 - Stop Letting Your Fear Rule Your Decisions

There are only two poles from which you can operate when making decisions. Fear is one…


For all episodes of the Transformation Series: https://www.charleskunken.com/blog?category=Transformation


Everything in your life is the result of your decisions.

Better yet, how you make those decisions.

And they can only be made in one of two ways: out of fear or out of love.

Just In Case Or Just In Time

Have you ever tried reading a book because you ‘should’? It’s excruciating. Every page is homework.

But when vacation comes (to the beach!) you crack open that steamy supermarket romance thriller.

You can’t even put it down save for your spouse forcing you to stop for 20 minutes to come eat dinner. Damn you, just fill up my wine.

As normal life returns you say ‘I really shouldn’t be reading that kind of trash’.

When really you should be reading that kind of trash every day.

A Familiar Face

You know what deciding based on love looks like. Attending your kid’s game, celebrating your friend’s birthday, going home for Christmas. Can’t wait to get started, excitement, giddy, joy.

You also know what fear looks like. Insurance, stocks, everybody else, uncertainty, obligation, standing out, pressure, unease, hoping, wishing, praying.

‘I couldn’t imagine missing it’ vs. ‘I really should.’

Red Or Black

What if the market goes down? What if it goes up? What if I want to change my mind later?

A fear-based choice is you taking a gamble that hopefully something turns out in a way that won’t disappoint you.

This gives you a probability of less than 1 that it will turn out ok. Who to marry, what degree to get…

Maybe it’s a 10-1. Maybe that book will come in handy someday.

Maybe it’s 100-to-1, depending on your bet.

But if you operate out of love you will always be 100% guaranteed that you made the right choice. You always win.


The variable to success is whether or not you can pause to identify which one is driving you.

Acknowledging that ‘this is fear’ will make it one notch easier for you to avoid going down that path.

Just in case or just in time?

Got some thoughts? Leave a comment or hit me up! charlie@charleskunken.com

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